Music or noise?

"Music has to be the spark that lights up the fire in human spirit."
-- Ludwig van Beethoven.

Right, I have been learning to play the violin from a music school in Selangor, and every year they will organize a sort of an annual concert. Last year I was very lucky to be able to join their orchestra, and to perform in their annual concert.

This orchestra is initiated by one of the teacher, she even volunteered to guide and conduct the orchestra. And mind you, she VOLUNTEERED, meaning she was not paid for all the trouble.

The concert last year was a huge success, and every one was happy with the orchestra, especially the performers themselves. And of course, me!

Early this year, everyone was already anticipating the annual concert. Finally in May, the concert pieces were out. Every one was really excited about the pieces. And like last year, the rehearsal session was held once every fortnightly.

But unlike last year, the attendace was poor. Despite the poor attendace, every one still work very hard. Although we will never be perfect, but if we work harder, we can be almost perfect.

And because of the limited rehearsal session, some of us organised a group practice session every alternate rehearsal session. Making it a practice session every week.

Why do we do this? Was it only because we want to take advantage on the school just to get more practice session? No! Because we want to play better in the concert, because we do not want to disapoint the school and the teacher.

As of last week, I received a memo from the school, infact every performer received one, it is a memo requiring the performer to pay a tution fees of RM100 per person for joining the orchestra, and because the attendace was poor.

Tuition fees?? But the teacher wasn't pay a cent for that. Then was it for utilities charges then? But isn't RM100 too much for utilities charges?

Or is this just another business opportunity for the school?

I don't know. But all the sudden, the school seems like a filthy beggar that will do anything for money, instead of the advocates of music and arts.
I wonder how hurt the teacher would be when she heard the news.

RM100 may not seems to be very much, but money is not the concern.
It is about how the school treat you, how the school value you, and how the school appreciate the orchestra.

Do they started up this music school to teach music because the love of music and they enjoy sharing it with the others? Or, just because the students are a bunch of idiots that they can exploid to make more money?

If so, was what they preached, music or noise?

edited 30th June 2005

Earth Angel

Earth Angel, earth angel
Will you be mine?
My darling dear, love you all the time
I'm just a fool, A fool in love with you


Me and my angel in Penang

Came back from Penang on moday, literally escaping the monday blue. haha....

But this week was a good week for me. I felt more energetic and motivated to work after the short break in penang. It was a really physically and mentally refrehing.

My angel and I together with an "Ang mo" friend of mine and his fiance visited the old fort Cornwallis. Though I have visited this place plenty of time during my secondary school years, but this time it somehow felt different. Well ya, they have done a very good job on the building conservation, but I think it felt different because there was an angel by my side.

Earth Angel, earth angel
The one I adore
Love you forever, and evermore
I'm just a fool, A fool in love with you
-- Penguins

Be it the truth or lies........

It has been all about "AP"s in the news lately.

"AP", or approved permit is a permit that will allow the holder to import cars into the country. It was also a tool for the government to help the bumiputra entrepeneurs to build up their empire. To help them get their shares in the chinese majorities' economy.

Recently, the ex-prime minister, Tun Tan sri Dr. Mahathir, claims that some of the AP holder are exploting the privilege, to escape the high taxes that imposed on imported cars, thus threatening the national car, Proton's, market shares.

In responding to Tun's claim, prime minister, Dato Badawi, also revealed that a few of the bumiputras are actually holding the majority of the APs. All this points to the Ministry of International Trades, and it raises doubts, in the procedure to approve the APs. Rumour even has it that cronism were involved.

The minister of international trades, Rafidah, denies involvement in the approval of the APs. And, ironicly, as of yesterday, another minister from the ministry of international trades admit that he was the one who is responsible for all approval of the APs and that minister Rafidah was unaware of any of this approval.

Well, even more irony thing is that, the APs was a supposingly bumiputras economy boosting program initiated during the time of prime minister Tun Tan Sri Dr. Mahathir.

Which is truth and which is lies, we will never know......
At the end of the day, the only one we needs to answer to, is ourself, our conscience.

"You can fool all of the people some of the time,
and some of the people all of the time,
but you cannot fool all of the people all of the time."

-- Abraham Lincoln.

What do you want in life?

Got a link from a colleague of mine. It is about the speech of Steve Jobs and how he affected her life.

A truely good read.Very insipring.
Something we all need from time to time. A reminder, or perhaps a ring of bell to awaken our innerself.
YouthCurry

If you are looking for the full article of Steve Jobs' speech to Stanford University (June 12, 2005), you can get access to it from this site:
Stanford

another good one... very thought provoking indeed..
shanxank's guide 2 face the world

* Make sure to download it to your local machine.

"I know what I need to do. What about you?"

The symbol of patriotism.

"Patriotism is a feeling of love and devotion to one's own homeland."
--Wikipedia.


Negaraku

Negaraku, tanah tumpah-nya darah ku,
Rakyat hidup, bersatu dan maju.
......
--"Negaraku", The national anthem of Malaysia.

As promiss, the picture taken somewhere near my office.
How shameful. The symbol of our country, torned and ruined.

Hang not our national flag, if you do not value her. Buy not out national flag, just because you wanted to show your spirit of patriotism on the National day, and then let it rot after the event. It is sad to see our national flag scattered on the floor, like rubbish.

If you want to hang our national flag, treat her right. If you want to show your spirit of patriotism, do it right. Starts with the man in the mirror, and love your national flag, love your country.

If you cannot even do this, what is the use of singing the national anthem in the cinema?
By the way, how many of us can still remember the lyrics and truely appreciate it? How many of us know the official version of the national anthem?

"How to love our country, when the country is treating us like a 2nd grade citizens?" you ask.
Yes, this is a difficult question to answer.

The truth is, it is very conflicting. In one hand, our country is among the safest in the world, harmonious, multi-races united and politically stable. In the other hand, corruption, cronism and no races equality.

What has our country did for us, especially to the chinese???

"Ask not what your country can do for you. Ask what you can do for your country."
--John F. Kennedy, President of the United States of America.

What have we done for our country, other than endless critism??

What have we done?
......

Why do we fall?

" Why do we fall, sir? So that we might better learn to pick ourselves up."
--Alfred Pennyworth, Batman Begins.

But what you would do? If you do not even realised that you are actually falling? In the world that relativity do not work (as einstein would have expected), there are no such thing as falling or flying... They are all the same. The distortion of falling is simply because of the benchmark you relate it to. Otherwise, you may even be flying now.

This is why success and failure is only inch apart. No, success and failure are one. Neither there are good nor evil.

This is something that the school, the society never teach... This is the greyish side the world. Part of the world that we seems to have forgotten or some of us choosed to ignore.

But of course, if you never learn to fall, you will not understand flying. Sounds confusing? Who told you life is easy.

Life is short. Live it.

"Why do we fall, sir?"
-- So that we know that we were standing. It is only cause and effect. It is only "karma".

You do not understand what I am trying to share? It is ok. I my self do not understand.
Perhaps next time. Perhaps......

C'est la vie, mon ami.

Me again.

It has been too busy to write blog lately. Virtually no time to do anything for myself. But if I want to blame anyone, I have to blame myself. Honestly, I have been procrastinating for too long, and now everything is chassing up to me.

"Procrastinating is the thief of time". Read that when I was in secondary school, I understand the meaning, but I never realised the effect, then or now.

By the way, I am finally connected to Streamyx. But still without the free modem. Then why? u ask? Don't ask.... I am too tired to explain. It's a long story........ The thing is, it turn out that Streamyx is just another way to connect to the internet. Nothing more. Why was I so frustrated then. Ego? perhaps.

My girlfriend would say that, after I have Streamyx I will not think of her that much... But if only she knows that, "What life is life, if Kai Lee do not by".....
Even the force cannot help. :P

Was going to write something about patriotism the other day. I took some photos of "patriotism" from somewhere near where I am working now. Ya, about partiotism again... I am patriotic... You do not believe me?? hahaha.... Anyway, will write about that, when I find a way to upload the pictures to my computer.

Getting fat lately.... really need to do some exercise! hehe

Thank god is friday.......

I am so glad it is friday again. It had been so tiring this week.

How could a usual working week so tiring? Am I getting older or what? Sigh... I am not sure.

Continuos nights of OT are taking a toll on me... My minds are so fatique and my EQ drops sharply. Too much works? or maybe it was some side effect from the trip to Taiping last week.

I doubt too much works as the cause. I used to work 7 days week non-stop, and it never cause me any problem.

So tiring..... So frustrated..... for no reasons. Ha!

Perhaps is the "happens every month" thing. But if I am not mistaken, that only happens to the female species.

hahahahaha....

Hope it will be gone soon.

God! I am so tired.

Patriotism

Is singing the national anthem, before a show starts in a cinema, really shows the spirit of patriotism?

I doubt it. I personally do not think that by singing National Anthem, hanging the national flag and buying the national car are consider as the act of patriotism. Patriotism requires more than that. Patriotism flows from the heart of a citizen. It grew from the seed of respecting and the love for one's homeland. These can never derive from mere singing the national anthem.

Many would say that, if you never been in a war, you would not love your homeland as much. But I disagree. I belive it is how a government runs in one's homeland that spark the spirit of patriotism. Peoples are naturally selfish. You love your homeland, but would you stay in a country full of corruption and unstable government? The answer is still no, right?

Lets face it. Patriotism, is not as simple as what we think.

I have a dream...

I have a dream that malays, chinese and indians will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.

I have a dream that one day all Malaysians will truely be united as one.

I have a dream that all Malaysians will one day live in a nation where the government is truely from the people, by the people and for the people.

I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all Malaysians are created equal."

I have a dream...

I love Malaysia.

Life, was it a box of chocolates?

"Life is like a box of chocolates, you'll never know what you gonna get."
- Forrest Gump.

But, is it true that we will never know what we gonna get? The statement is not exactly true, right? What if the box chocolates are akind? Then we should probably know what we gonna get next.

Well, perhaps life IS like a box of chocolates, the thing is that, the chocolates may not taste the same everytime we taste them. Depending on the environment, our moods, our feelings.... they all influences our taste buds. Opps, slightly out of point here. Suppose to be talking about life not chocolates tasting.. :P

But I am not out of point here. Life, good or bad, it all depends on how we perceive things and how we react to things. We decide how we feel; not the others.

Every now and then, when ever some bad things happened to us, we need only to look at different angle. The situation may not be as bad, and the world would be a better world to live in.

Every now and then, when good things happened to us, we should be gradeful and thankful. For other may not be as lucky.

A quote from the song "Return to Innocence".
"Don't be afraid to be weak Don't be too proud to be strong Just look into your heart my friend That will be the return to yourself The return to innocence . If you want, then start to laugh If you must, then start to cry Be yourself don't hide Just believe in destiny . Don't care what people say Just follow your own way Don't give up and use the chance To return to innocence"

Life is short. Live it.
You have the power to choose!!

Star Wars III, the after thought...

watched 2 1/4 times Star Wars Episode III, "The Revenge Of The Sith". How come 2 /14 times ? Don't ask me..... It's a long story.

The 2nd time I watch the movie, I sense the sadness and the loneliness in Anakin. Although a great Jedi, he has no friend, well no other friend, other than Obi-wan and Padme, his wife. Perhaps to him, the world is either "white" or "black", no in between. Therefore when "grey" comes in, he starts to confused. Not knowing what to do, no one to "really" guide him (everyone was too busy with the ongoing war), and without the trust even from his own ally, the Jedi Council, he eventually stray to the dark side.

When the world don't trust you anymore, what would you do? To me, I would do anything just that please me. In the case of Anakin, saving his wife is the top priority. So, it is not wrong for Anakin to seek help from the one, the only one, the Chancellor, that can help, when the Jedi Council shut him away. Infact, from the whole movie, the Chancellor was the only one who really cares for him, the Chancellor value his power. Not even Padme (Padme wanted to leave him, when she learns that he has changed).

It is very true what Chancellor Palpatine says, "Those who holds the power, are afraid to lose the power, even the Jedi.". Remember Mace Windu? He is the best example. Why don't he trust Anakin? Why he forbid Anakin to follow them to arrest the Chancellor? Was he really worry about Anakin? To me, the answer is no. I felt that Mace Windu was jealous of Anakin, who was being so powerful and so close to the Chancellor (The highest power in the republic), yet so young. To arrest the Chancellor with his own power, will shows to the world that he, Mace Windu, is still as powerful and perhaps equally powerful as Anakin, both politically and in skills. In the movie, when the Chancellor, now Darth Sidious, was defeated, Mace Windu was going to arrest him until Anakin suddenly appear. When that happen, Mace Windu changes his mind from arresting the dark lord to killing dark load. Now why? Arrogant. If you are a Master Jedi, you don't want a Jedi Knight to jump out from no where and start to lecture you about the Jedi Code. So, Mace Windu has to kill the dark lord, to prove that he is more powerful, wiser, and the most important he represent the Jedi Council, HE is the Jedi Council. Mace Windu failed because of his arragont and the fear of loosing to the Sith. "A master is he? No, Not he is. Only human he is."

So, is Anakin good or evil? It depends on how you look at him. But even your answer is evil, there is still good in him. Remember the scene where Anakin was stading in the veranda at Mustafar? The shot shows his angry eyes, but if you look closer, you can see that he is crying. The first time I watch the movie, I only saw an angry dark lord, but the second time, I saw a lonely, troubled, and sad boy.

Perhaps the true enemy of the Republic was the practice of the Force. Because of how one uses the force, the world is forcefully split into, what know as, the "Light" and the "Dark". With the existent of Jedi and Sith clans, there will always be war. Unless one day the "Light" and the "Dark" can be join as one Force, then peace will come.

"The true nature of the force is not just to feel them and use them, but to be one with the force; like dripping drops of water into a glass of water, they become one."
--ekoay

May the Force be with you!

Betrayal.

Seems like nothing good is happening to me lately. First being traumatized after the Streamyx incident, then come this, betrayal from a friend.

Maybe the word betrayal may sound too harsh, what my friend did not me actually don't come near to the word either. Just that, sometimes, the frustration inside needs to be released. Especially if this is not the first time.

Some people take promisses too lightly. They like to promiss you this, promiss you that. But in the end, nothing come true. Ok, granted that sometimes some unexpected thing pop out that hinder you from fufilling your promisses. But if these unexpected things keep on happening, then, there must be something wrong somewhere. Or maybe you never intend to keep the promiss.

Perhaps, those who do not keep their promisses, just do not think the one they promiss to are anything important. They wanted to keep the promisses, but not a priority. In that case, why even it a promiss?

Isn't a promiss something we intend to keep, whole heartedly? What is happening to our integrity?

"The answer my friend, is blowing in the wind, the answer is blowing in the wind."

Still, no matter what, I am very grateful to what I have now, especially with my girlfriend, who is always there for me.

Streamyx Horror II

This is an unfair and cruel world. Hope was given to me, and then it was taken away from me..... I am in the depth of despair. 3 years, for 3 years I have been waiting for Streamyx to come to my place. For 3 years, I can only admire and envy those who have Streamyx services at their place. For 3 years.... I have been waiting.

For 3 years, everytime a neighbourhood near my place starts to receiving Streamyx services, I felt that I could almost got it. But everytime, it was so near yet so far away. Ooh! Streamyx, I dreamed of you in my dream and I smell of you when I am awake.

Sometimes, I just stare at the doorway, don't know to turn left or to turn right; to go forward or to turn around. I think I am starting to loosing my mind.

What have I done wrong to deserve this faith.

You told me there were services in my area, then you tell me I am back in the waiting list. Ooh! Streamyx I curse you! Curse you! Damn you!

Please, please expand you coverage area and open up more ports.... I beg you Streamyx.

Please, I am loosing my mind....

Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow...

Winter Wonderland - The happiest day.

Picture taken from Snow World, Genting. Practically a HUGE fridge with expensive entrance fees. Anyway, it gives us a chance to experience the below zero environment for 40 minutes. Well minus the time taken to choose the jacket, gloves, shoes and etc, you are left with only 30 minutes? Hahahaha...

P.S. remember to bring along a MP3 player to play the Winter Sonata while you are inside. Have fun!

"It is useless to regret later. Value what you have now and be grateful."
- ekoay

Streamyx Horror.

After being put on waiting list for more then 3 years, Streamyx finally reached my area. You may be asking, "How come you are not happy about that? Why horror?". Yes, I was very happy until the Streamyx people came.

They told me the package that I registered, do not comes with the ADSL modem. I was in shock. I ask them, isn't the RM88 package comes with the free modem? And they told me the answer that blew me out of my mind. They say, mine was an older order that do not comes with the free modem. Only the recent promotion includes that. And you know what, they ask me if I wanted to buy a modem from them which will cost me around RM180-200.

I mean, are they trying to cheat me or what? How can TM, the biggest broadband service provider in Malaysia, sub-con their work to such a company??

I heard from a friend of mine, who is in the Streamyx line, tell me that every customer that the Streamyx reseller get, they get certain amount of comission, regardless if they are in the service area or not. Then, when a customer activated the service, they get extra comission and the comission from the modem price. Hahahaha... so now you know how Streamyx operates. Streamyx should have spend the money in upgrading and expanding its service.

Weird, weird world.....

Anyway, I called up my friend, and he settle for me everything. RM88 per month package, WITH THE FREE MODEM.

You just have to be extra careful these days.......

Staying focus.

I see skies of blue, clouds of white ..... What a wonderful world.
(picture taken from the 20th floor, First World Hotel, Genting)

Just came back from Genting 2 days ago. It was really a mind refreshing trip. Genting is a great place to be at, but still, it feels like something is missing.

I often think that, we Malaysian, has the resources, the man power and the will to success, but how come what we have here still look and feel like 10-20 years backward from other country?

For instance, the theme park in Genting, I am sure they have all the resources needed to create a world class entertainment hub. Yet it only provides some badly maintain, uninteresting, outdated, and not worth the money paid for, amusement.

Another example, Proton, same thing, and more, it has got the gorvernment backup them, protect them in the automobile market. Yet, all we get is low graded, highly fragile car. But of course they are cheaper.

Why is this?

The only answer I can think of is the lack passion in what they do to achieve what they wanted.

The Disneyland of USA and the car maker from Germany. What do they share, what do they have in common? Yes, passion.

Disneyland wanted to be the happiest place in the world, and they did. They were able to focus on the vision to be the happiest place in the world, although profiting is still one important agenda. And the German car maker, to make the safest car, is their vision.

But from what i see in Malaysia, to maximise the profit usually is the top agenda. They would diversified the trade, they would venture in every corner of the market, monopolised the market is what they wanted.

In the end, they achieved in doing everything but failed in making aything great.

Genting, ever wander of why the only successful attraction in Genting is the casino? Think about that.

"No lions are ever caught in mousetraps. To catch lions you must think in terms of lions, not in terms of mice. Your mind is always creating traps of one kind or another, and what you catch depends on the thinking you do. It is your thinking that attracts to you what you receive."
-- Gil Bailie

WW I then WW II and what is next?

War in Iraq

If war is such a horrible thing, why is it keep on happening around us?

"The only thing people learned from war, is that people do not learn anything from war."
- Unknown author.

The unforgiven

There was a german movie released September last year. "DerUntergang" its called. The movie is about what happened to Hitler and, generally Berlin during the last 10 days of his life. According to movie review, this is the first german movie to potray Hitler, although the character was played by a swiss rather than a german.

It has been 60 years since WWII ended. The german and japanese appologised to the world on their crime against humanity times after times. Some sincere, some not so sincere. Some twisted the facts and some acknowledge the madness done by their previous generation.

The question is, should they be forgiven? Or should they be punish for things done by the previous generation? How long should they be punish? Or they must bear the name "war crime" till the end of time?

I don't know. I do not have the answer.

"In my humble opinion, in the nuclear world, the true enemy of war, is war itself."
- Executive Officer, onboard USS Alabama.

Ghost Stories

"Why is it always have to be a story from your distance relatives, your cousin, or your friends' friends? But, have you ever seen one yourself? Do you dare to try?", The Eye 10.

Me? of course I've never seen one myself. I think i heard one before, but i am not sure. But ghost sotries leh, I have heard alot. Some of the stories are crap while some are really scarry. :P and very true, they all happened to a friend's friend. heheheheheh...

If you know Lowyat.com, you should know that they host a forum especially for the local ghost stories. Not Vampire nor Frankenstein, but puntianak and toyo. More than that, they have stories like paper made car speeding down the highway and exorcism performed in a rural village. hahahaha... all beyond your imagination. (perhaps, the director of "The EYE" should do some research from lowyat.com)

Genting? The most notorious and haunted place in the whole of malaysia?? PLEASE!!!!! I DON"T WANT TO HEAR ANYMORE!!!!

Please lah, i am going to genting this coming weekend.... story? ya I am interested to hear, but tell me only when i come back ok!

By the way, has anyone tried the 8 methods (excluding cornea transplant, and suicide) from the movie "The Eye 10"??? :-}

"Once the game is started, there are no turning back. What ever happens, we have to finish the game.", The Eye 10

Everyday is a new day.

"A new day has come, a new day has come......" ok, enough of Celine Dione. It is very true, everyday is a new day to start with. Everyday we have the chance to right what was wrong (maybe to certain extend only), to finish the unfinished, to say the unsaid, to love what we have neglected, to forgive, and most important of all, to value what we have miss. To live as there are tomorrow (of course to certain extend only!).

We live in a pressure cooker, if we do not look things at the bright side, we, ourselves will be the one to suffer, not the other people. The pressures are building, we must learn how to cope with it or how to release its tension, or else...... haha supervolcano!

Why i suddenly talk about this thing? Because i have seen things, hear things and experienced things.... and i know things.

Relax guys... a long week ahead!

"We don't see things as they are, we see things as we are”